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My stepfamily research since 1979 suggests that after child-related disputes, financial matters are the second most conflictual area for typical co-parents . Typical surface issues span prenuptial agreements; child-support amounts, responsi-bilities, promptness, and uses; asset and debt ownership; wills and estate plans; children's allowances and money values; spending vs. saving; bill-paying; checkbook management; acceptable debt levels; credit ratings; insurance amounts and responsibilities; and child-expense "fairness." Typical wounded, needy courting couples don't admit and negotiate major values-differences on these complex financial topics before they exchange vows. Even if they do, unresolved barriers with their other co-parents and/or relatives will promote major values and loyalty conflicts over "money issues." The frequency, complexity, and intensity of these surface disputes are usually significantly greater than in average intact biofami-lies. For more perspective, read about resolving financial disputes between mates, ex mates, and/or step-relatives. slides 1 > 2 / perspective / co-parenting links / Q&A / close |
Stepfamily Realities 25 & 26 -