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Healing false-self wounds and building high-nurturance stepfamily relationships usually require qualified professional help along the way. In my experience, typical unaware, wounded co-parents don't know how to identify clinicians who are competent to help in false-self wound- recovery and preventing or resolving common stepfamily stressors - and they don't know what they need to know. Begin to solve this by studying Project 1 and assessing your co-parents for false-self wounds. Then study these fundamentals. Third, use your expanded knowledge to interview counselors, attorneys, clergy, and other professional helpers to judge if they're guided by their true Self, and know enough of these stepfamily basics.. Doing this protects against following uninformed advice, wasting time and money, and eventual re/divorce. Shame-based co-parents often feel unqualified to evaluate human-service professionals like they do plumbers, beauticians, tutors, and mechanics. True Selves know better. See also these questions and answers, and this interesting NY Times article. Choosing competent stepfamily help is part of co-parent Project 11 in this nonprofit Web site. |
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