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Do you postpone unpleasant responsibilities and situations "too much" - even if that causes problems? Procrastination is common with typical fear-based survivors of low-nurturance childhoods. One of the personality subselves kids develop to survive is deter-mined to guard Inner Children from overwhelm by convincing the host person to defer risky or uncertain decisions or actions. Another sub-self, the Magician, usually provides convincing reality distortions about why putting things off (avoiding) is justified, no problem, and even helpful. The tireless Catastrophizer may add vivid thoughts and images of the awful consequences of not deferring - or of deferring. Typical subselves like these will only relax when they learn to really trust the resident true Self and other Manager subselves to keep the Inner Kids safe enough. self-improvement Lesson 1 and "parts work" provide an effective framework for building such trust, and gradually allowing these devoted Guardian subselves to relax and consider taking on useful new roles in the person's personality. Can you imagine not wanting to put off unpleasant or boring things? |
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