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Do you know an adult or child who postpones unpleasant responsi-bilities and situations "too much" - even if that causes them problems? Excessive procrastination is common with typical fear-based survivors of low-nurturance childhoods. One of the personality subselves kids develop in order to survive is de-termined to guard Inner Children from shame, guilt, anxiety, loss, and overwhelm by artfully convincing the host person to defer risky or uncer-tain decisions or actions. Another well-meaning subself, the Magician, usually provides convincing reality distortions about why putting things off (avoiding) is justified, no problem, and even helpful. The tireless Catas-trophizer may add vivid thoughts and images of the awful consequences of not deferring - or of deferring. Typical subselves like these will only relax when they learn to really trust the resident true Self and other Regular subselves to keep the Inner Kids safe enough. Family Project 1 and "parts work" provide an effective framework for building such trust, and gradually allowing these devoted Guardian subselves to relax and consider taking on useful new roles in the person's personality. Can you imagine not wanting to put off unplea-sant things? more detail / slides / Project-1 index and guidebook / Q&A / close |
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