Lesson 4 of 7  - optimize your relationships

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A Quiz About Relationships

Do you know what
 you need to know?

By Peter K. Gerlach, MSW
Member NSRC Experts Council

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The Web address of this quiz is https://sfhelp.org/relate/quiz4.htm

Updated  02-12-2015

      Clicking underlined links here will open a new window. Other links will open  an informational popup, so please turn off your browser's popup blocker or allow popups from this nonprofit Web site. If your playback device doesn't support Javascript, the popups may not display. Follow underlined links after finishing this article to avoid getting lost.

      For fun, rank your current knowledge first:

_  I know a little about human relationships

_  I know more than many people about relationships

_  I'm an expert on interpersonal relationships

      Now, take this brief YouTube mini-quiz about relationships before you read further.

      Premises - awareness of relationship basics will significantly improve your daily life. Most people are only vaguely aware of them, and endure significant relationship confusion and stress without knowing how to improve them. Lessons 1-4 in this online course show you how to do so.

      Take this quiz before you start Lesson 4, when you finish it, and randomly after that. Choose an  undistracted place, and allow at least 45" to answer these items. Decide whether your true Self is taking this quiz or some other personality subselves are. If the latter, expect skewed results.

      Take your time here. Answering superficially defeats the value of this quiz. Check an item as "true" (__) only if you can confidently check all sub-items (_). If you're unsure, use "?"

       Options - answer these questions out loud, and follow the links to check your answers. Consider taking and discussing this quiz with your mate, a friend, and/or a relative. If you have kids, wonder how they will learn the answers to these questions.

      If you want to cheat, study these Q&A items about relationships first.  

colorbutton.gif (663 bytes)  What I Know About Human Relationships

__ 1)  Describe each of these relationship terms out loud.

__ 2)  Explain...

_  what human needs are,

_  the difference between surface needs and primary needs, and...

_  why knowing this difference is important in all relationships.

__ 3)  Explain...

_ what a relationship is,

_ when it starts and ends, and...

_ why relationships occur.

__ 4)  Name...

_ four groups of factors needed for a mutually-satisfying relationship  between any two people, and...

_ at least five factors in each group.

__ 5)  Describe the key differences between nurturing relationships and toxic relationships.  

__ 6)  Explain how to judge whether a relationship is nurturing or toxic.

__ 7)  Explain...

_ what a human personality is,

_ how it's formed, and...

_ what's required to improve it.

__ 8)  Describe what's needed to have a healthy relationship with your Self.

__ 9)  Describe...

_ how the personalities of two people in a relationship interact, and...

_ how to talk about that interaction effectively with relationship partners.

__ 10) Explain what's needed to maintain a nurturing relationship with a Higher Power

__ 11)  Describe what makes family relationships different than others.

__ 12)  Describe...

_ relationship addiction (codependence),

_ what causes it, and...

_ options for reducing it.

__ 13)  Explain...

_ what social roles and rules are,

_ how they originate, and...

_ how they each affect the quality of typical relationships.

__ 14)  Explain...

_ what an interpersonal boundary is, and...

_ how to manage typical boundary conflicts and violations.    

__ 15)  Explain...

_  what an interpersonal (or innerpersonal) relationship triangle is,

why triangles can be significantly stressful - specially if minor kids are involved; and...

_  how people can avoid and permanently dissolve significant triangles.

__ 16)  Describe...

_ the differences between, codependent, interdependent, and independent relationships, and...

_ the key traits of each type.

__ 17)  Describe...

_ at least eight differences between typical "male brains" and "female brains," and...

_ why knowing these differences helps in managing relationships with adults and kids.

__ 18)  Describe at least four ways to relate well to someone who is grieving.

__ 19)  Explain...

_ the difference between anger and frustration, and...

_ what a personal and family anger policy is.

__ 20)  Name at least six primary needs that typical mates try to fill with each other.

__ 21)  Name...

_ at least five traits that courting adults should be aware of in choosing the right partner,

_ five right-reasons to commit to a mate, and...

_ five signs it's the right time to commit.

__ 22)  Name at least eight courtship danger signs.

__ 23)  Describe...

_  five reasons for the U.S. divorce epidemic

_  the three phases of a normal divorce,

_  at least 10 typical divorce-adjustment tasks kids and adults face, and...

_  how to judge when a divorce is finished.

__ 24)  Describe seven communication skills people need to manage their relationships effectively.

__ 25)  Explain what an R-message is, and how it affects relationships.

__ 26)  Explain...

_ what a relationship problem is, and...

_ three things that usually cause them.

__ 27)  Name at least three things that make relating to typical minor kids different than to adults.

__ 28)  Describe...

_ how to recognize someone with significant psychological wounds, and

_ at least four keys to relating well with wounded adults and kids.

__ 29)  Describe how to...

_ analyze most relationship problem and

_ how to resolve them.

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      How do you feel now about your knowledge about relationships? Do most of your family adults know these fundamentals? Do you think average adults could "pass" this quiz? Where do you think minor kids should learn these fundamentals? How do you feel about the premise that average adults don't know what they need to know?

      Recall how you rated your knowledge before taking this quiz. Would you change your rating now?

       Self-improvement Lessons 1 thru 4 provide answers to all these questions.

      Pause, breathe, and reflect - why did you read this quiz? Did you get what you needed? If not - what do you need? Who's answering these questions - your wise true Self or ''someone else''?

  This quiz was very helpful  somewhat helpful  not helpful    

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