Basic co-parenting responsibilities for this unique child:
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Steadily feel and show
unconditional
love |
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Steadily feel and show conditional
respect |
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Listen: learn this child's
fears, dreams, feelings, hopes, and needs |
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Be a loyal companion, friend,
and playmate |
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Give merited praise and recognition
often |
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Feel and show honest affection |
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Give healthy touching, hugs, and kisses |
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Encourage and guide this child, rather than criticize and
shame |
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Protect this child from
dangers, and
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Guard
this child against re/divorce trauma |
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Resolve
conflicts between this child's co-parents and relatives |
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Names / initials |
BP1 |
SP1 |
BP2 |
SP2 |
Child |
Other |
Who's responsible to consistently
model
and teach this child healthy ...
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self respect, and
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Self-nurturance values and skills
(vs. self neglect |
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Self-protection skills |
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Personal honesty and accountability |
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Personal hygiene values and habits |
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Proper bathroom manners and
behaviors |
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Language / swearing
name-calling / limits |
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Verbal and written
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Effective
skills |
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Managing
effectively |
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aggression,
frustration, and impulse management |
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Empathy,
sensitivity, and tact |
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Nudity, modesty, and privacy standards |
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Safe driving skills, and vehicle
care |
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Proper ethical and moral judgment |
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Respectful attitudes about race, creed,
gender, and ethnic differences
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Personal respect for Nature
and the Earth |
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Names / initials |
BP1 |
SP1 |
BP2 |
SP2 |
Child |
Other |
Responsibilities for this child's schooling |
Assess this child's unique
gifts and talents, and nurture them steadily |
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Pick the right school
/
daycare
agency |
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Choose and monitor effective,
nurturing teachers |
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Select the right school
subjects |
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Develop effective study,
learning, and school attitudes |
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Set clear, appropriate
school-performance
expectations and standards
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Help this child with homework
and special projects |
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Request, attend, and follow up on
school conferences |
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Set and enforce TV,
phone, and computer limits |
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Choose, monitor, and support
this
child's
extra curricular activities |
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Attend this child's games /
performances / ceremonies |
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Monitor and pay school
/
college expenses |
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Resolve any major
problems
with these |
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Sleep
/ Rest
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Decide where, when, and with whom this child
sleeps |
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Choose, decorate, furnish this
child's bedroom/s |
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Clean this child's
bedroom/s,
sheets, etc. |
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See that this child gets
enough sleep |
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Get this child up on time
for school /
work |
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Teach and model
balancing work, play, and
rest |
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Resolve any major rest-related
problems
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Names / initials |
BP1 |
SP1 |
BP2 |
SP2 |
Child |
Other |
Health and Growth |
Supervise this child's weight,
diet, and exercise |
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Get or give
first aid, when needed |
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Set and enforce
alcohol, smoking, and other drug limits |
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Provide timely, effective
sex education, guidance,
limits, and protections |
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Choose this child's
health providers |
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Arrange behavioral counseling / medical
/ dental
/ optical / appointments |
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Provide transport |
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Monitor / evaluate
/ follow up on these
visits |
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Get / give / monitor any
medications |
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Pay for this child's health-related
expenses |
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Provide and monitor health
insurance |
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Resolve major problems on any of these |
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Family and Other Relationships |
Help this child clearly
define "
now?" |
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Help clarify this child's
role responsibilities
as a stepchild / stepsibling / stepgrandchild |
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Teach this child key
stepfamily- biofamily
differences and realities |
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Decide / act on stepparental
adoption
of this
child |
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Family names and titles: decide what this child will
call each
stepfamily member |
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Resolve conflicts between
stepsibs and/or
step-relatives |
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Resolve
affecting this child |
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Resolve this child's stepparent/s' feeling
"second best" too often |
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Promote mutual
respect with
stepsibs and half-sibs
(if any) |
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Facilitate a
healthy relationship between this child
and their non-custodial bioparent |
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Facilitate healthy relationships between this child and
their relatives |
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Facilitate healthy relationships between this child
and their step-kin |
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Inform this child's teacher/s, doctor/s, and
minister "we are a multi-home stepfamily" |
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Promptly resolve major disputes among this
child's
co-parents |
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Arrange
and provide transportation to /
from friends' homes and social events |
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Choose, buy, and
pay for this child's party
supplies and presents |
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Plan and oversee
sleepovers and parties |
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Set and enforce this child's
telephone
limits |
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Make and enforce their "check in"
rules |
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Set and enforce their
curfew limits |
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Arrange, transport,
and pay for their baby
sitters, and resolve problems with them |
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Choose, buy, and
care for this child's pets |
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Resolve major conflicts on any of these |
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