What's an Effective
response" to problem behavior meets four conditions:
you accept full responsibility for
filling your own needs,
and give other able people responsibility
for filling theirs - without guilt or anxiety;
you're clear on your and their
as dignified, worthy
you don't model problem behaviors while asking others to change
after your response, all people involved feel...
fully heard, respected, and
satisfied with the outcome - i.e. each person got their current
primary needs met, and any boundaries (limits) were honored, well enough;
that they followed their own
integrities (were true to their values and standards);
good enough about the
way they interacted together; and every-one feels...
that their relationships were
nurtured, vs. degraded.