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An abuser is someone who chronically justifies using helpless people to satisfy his or her own needs. A tyrant is someone who is overly self-centered, demanding, shaming (disrespectful), aggressive (vs. assertive), and controlling with other people. Sadists enjoy dominance, power, and causing pain to other living things. Adults and kids with these traits are often controlled by one or several young and/or Guardian personality subselves including a Magician, who justifies or excuses these behaviors. Together, these subselves (a) dis-able the resident true Self, and (b) promote these traits despite social disapproval. Such wounded people may also be influenced by their Inner Critic and Guilty Child subselves to cause remorse feelings and behaviors. Then the person repeats his or her original behaviors again - perhaps saying "I can't help it." Typical people dominated by this subself experienced (a) major neglect and abuse as young kids, and (b) were taught that this was their fault ("You make me whip you!"). People controlled by these subselves are NOT "bad" or "evil," they're wounded and don't know what to do about that. Project 1 in this non-profit Web Site offers wounded people an effective way to reduce their false-self wounds and harmonize their team of talen-ted, devoted subselves over time. more detail / slides / Project 1 index and guidebook / Q&A / close |